Invent

Positive Psychology

Trust your workmates & managers? Open to new worlds

Trust is a very special commodity.

Yet we live in a world full of low-trust & suspicion. The emerging streams of newsfeed fill our waking lives with examples of discrepancies, dishonesty, ulterior motives, not- so-hidden agendas, personal gains, neglectful practice & backhanders which feeds us with low-trust.  So who can we trust? And how? I was always told that there’s no such thing as automatic trust, you have to earn it!

Getting savvy to our own psychological trusting makeup helps us to see through the mist & smokescreens of good relating with others. Personal relationships, romantic relationships, work relationships all demand a level of receptivity & scrutiny from our trust monitor. Our radar of previous hurts, childhood wounds, experiences of having our trust broken is on the look- out for indicators & first whiff of something fishy, our self-preservation armour clunks into place. We are full of so many downloaded mis-trust messages in our psychological inner world – “don’t talk to strangers”, “be careful, the world is not a safe place”,  “ people are only nice to you because they want something”

Dr Stephen Covey (famous for his 7 habits of highly effective people) says in his book Smart Trust, that there is a high cost to maintaining our worldview of blind trust (gullibility) or distrust (suspicion) – we get hurt, burned and more importantly, we close off the spontaneity, magic, joy & energy in our lives & relationships.

to trust is to take a risk, and risks are to be taken wisely. But to trust is also to open new worlds

 Fernando Flores former finance minister of Chile

To learn to trust is a delightful journey, getting wise to the range of components within us to help us make decisions. Here’s how..

  1.  Change your internal downloaded landscape-behaviours, programming, attitudes
  2. Learn to trust yourself : decision making, discernment, credibility, competence, gut-feeling
  3.  Act with integrity – walk your talk/new attitude, demonstrate trustworthiness
  4.  Expect trust, extend trust to others -allow yourself to be vulnerable, authentic in your communications

 Building relationships, you build trust, when trust is present, magic & new energy emerges, then anything can happen

Pamela Harland

Who is the most trusted person in your team – why? Which leader in your company do you have most trust in – why? Find out how to increase the trust in your team. Find out how to create a high-trust environment at work.

See wellbeing at work seminars page.

TRUST IS CONTAGIOUS, TAKE A LEAP OF TRUST TODAY

Pamela Harland, Wellbeing Consultant holds wellbeing seminars at work for team trust building & provides wellbeing mentoring sessions for professionals.

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Using technology to enable dreaming

Has our technology — our cell phones and iPods and cameras — stopped us from dreaming?  Young artist Shilo Shiv Suleman says no, as she demos “Khoya,” her new storybook for iPad, which floats us through a magical world in 7 minutes of pure creativity.

I was mesmerised by the interactive storytelling on the iPad & loved the way she creatively brought nature alive.  Shilo says “I was terrified by this idea that I would lose the ability to enjoy and appreciate the sunset without having my camera on me, without tweeting it to my friends. It felt like technology should enable magic, not kill it.”

I am inspired by Shilo’s creativity but  left wondering is virtual nature is enough for our hearts & soul? Or is it too dis-connected?  Nothing really touches us in the same way the colours of the sunset, or the energy of ocean waves breaking on the shore fill us with awe, grace & light.  This technology can certainly helps children wake up to new possibilities, find alternative realities to urban city life.  Children are loosing the art of creativity, wonder & dreaming, perhaps this is a middle way.

Take a few mintues & have a look at what the technology can offer! Enjoy.

 

click here for short talk

Shilo Shiv Suleman

 

Pamela Harland is a Wellbeing Consultant & Group facilitator, UK Counselling Psychologist specialising in Workplace Wellbeing. Pamela is passionate about bringing Positive Psychology techniques to workplaces, teams and individuals to create a Spirit of Wellbeing Culture.

 

 

 

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Is work making us mentally ill ?

Friday 24 Feb 2012

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate, Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure, It is our light, not our darkness that frightens us most.  As you let your light shine, you unconsciously give others permission to do the same, Liberated from your fear, your presence liberates others.  Nelson Mandela’s inaugural speech 1994

Looking at our emotional health at work, I was intrigued by a recent UK study by Chartered Institute of Personnel & Development (CIPD)

on supporting mental health in the workplace.  In 2011, they commissioned YouGov to survey over 2000 employees to identify their experiences & attitudes about the degree of mental health at work. 26% reported mental health difficulties, with women higher than men. Rates were also higher in the 35 to 44 year age group.

CIPD also cite the CAUSES of mental health problems

15% of those surveyed say the cause was problems at work, 20% report cause was their personal lives & 65% report a combination of the both. Gender differences were shown here too with women more likely to say cause was due to personal reasons whereas men more likely to say work was the cause of their poor mental health.    This study shows that work can be causing undue  mental health problems which creates implications for organisations in their legislative duty of care to staff.

Also a recent article on Stuff

showed the mounting costs of mental illness on organisations, estimating the cost to organisations in the region of NZ$2000 per employee a year in terms off  sickness absence, reduced productivity at work and replacing staff who leave their jobs because of mental ill health.

 So why is work becoming such a source of difficult mental health?

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4 simple steps to remind yourself to self-nurture – you deserve it!

Isn't it time you gave some back to you? Picture taken from http://www.marqui.com

 I was enjoying walking by the ocean, golden sands, gentle lapping waves, emerald-azure waters, I could be feeling absolutely amazing or I could be lost within my dark thoughts. Then I was contemplating what does the internal landscape really look like & how do we take care of ourselves. Maintaining a feel-good factor is quite an art, even an ongoing okayness can be tricky. Our runaway thoughts are compelling & addictive as they fuel the epic 3D stories & tales – current & past.

Before we can say Jack Robinson (and who the hell was he anyway?) we have entered the dragon’s lair, fears, anxieties, self-recriminations, resentments emerge from the dragon’s fire & we spiral down. So many of our feelings especially anxieties, reside in the gut /sacral centre, yet somewhere within us we have the capacity to ease this fire & nurture ourselves, when we start to feel bad.

With over 15 years working therapeutically with clients with a mixed bag of tricks from counselling, psychology, NLP, EFT & education, there are surely some useful tips for stopping us going down the plug-hole with the baby. In my experience anxiety & depression are the 2 most common presenting issues that clients bring causing bucket loads of low self-esteem.

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Developing Inner Super-Vision at Work

 

Have you ever wondered why it is that some work interactions and events can trigger big emotional responses such as over-reactions, misunderstandings, injustices, defensiveness or emotional shut down, retaliations?

From my client work through EAP schemes over the years I am amazed at the amount of bullying that exists in organisations – hierarchical, horizontal, group peer pressure & so on. I wonder why it is becoming so common place when we all have  the right to a nurturing and supportive organisational culture instead of one which is harmful & anxious.

I found December’s HRINZ meeting with Laura Crawshaw, Boss Whispering Institute – Intervening With Abrasive Leaders, very interesting in its perspective of providing group feedback to the ‘bully’ focused on interpersonal behaviour that causes emotional distress in coworkers sufficient to disrupt the organisational functioning, without the need for formal investigations & defences. see http://www.bosswhispering.com/

For coworkers who find themselves in a difficult relationship environment or victim mode, there is a better way to be – develop the inner super-visor.

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