Have you ever wondered why it is that some work interactions and events can trigger big emotional responses such as over-reactions, misunderstandings, injustices, defensiveness or emotional shut down, retaliations? From my client work through EAP schemes over the years I am amazed at the amount of bullying that exists in organisations – hierarchical, horizontal, group peer pressure & so on. I wonder why it is becoming so common place when we all have the right to a nurturing and supportive organisational culture instead of one which is harmful & anxious.
I found December’s HRINZ meeting with Laura Crawshaw, Boss Whispering Institute – Intervening With Abrasive Leaders, very interesting in its perspective of providing group feedback to the ‘bully’ focused on interpersonal behaviour that causes emotional distress in coworkers sufficient to disrupt the organisational functioning, without the need for formal investigations & defences. see http://www.bosswhispering.com/
For coworkers who find themselves in a difficult relationship environment or victim mode, there is a better way to be – develop the inner super-visor. Learning the art of mindful non-reaction to people & situations outside of ourselves is a Buddhist life’s mission, trying to stay in a place of equilibrium. We can’t wait that long! In my view there is another ‘middle way’ which is far more self-kind.
The authentic Inner Self is an enriching source of our true essence, full of unbridled creativity & curiosity for experience. However, the mind with its analytical dialogue is the dog with a bone – the mental drama re-runs of I should have said…he must have meant……does he not understand……..& so on. How do we step off the endless inner chatterbox that usually collapses our self-confidence & self-worth? How do we access our inner Spirit for joyful life?
What we need to do is access our Inner Wise Super-Vision.
5 easy ways to develop the wise internal supervisor
Taken from the counseling therapeutic model of working with clients, we can develop the art of bringing in the WISE INTERNAL SUPERVISOR.
Its like moving into a 3rd position – having an overview of the situation, like watching a film or like being on the Cloud looking down, seeing myself interacting with the other person & at the same time viewing life from a position of all-knowing intuitive wisdom (which we all have!).
Step 1. Take a deep breath & pause
Step 2. Let go of the emotional reaction & stop the analytical internal dialogue, just for a short while, to gather yourself
Step 3. Bring in your wise internal super-visor mode – access something more meaningful, higher vibrational from your eternal life force (ELF)
Step 4. Have I been here before – are there echoes of the past ? what did I need to heal, let go of?
Step 5. What are my needs & what action do I need to take – take good care of yourself, develop a positive emotional mindset intelligence
Pamela Harland – higher dimension counselling & healing
If you wish to learn more about how to access your internal super-vision contact Pamela 021 114 7878 for a Wellbeing Supervision session.